I think I can... or Can't

Something occurred to me the other day- while I was talking to someone, I said "I can't"- after I said it I noticed that I immediately felt like... saddened, let down, depressed, punished... have you ever felt that way? Have you taken that moment right after you speak... to really see how the statement made you feel? You might hear people saying "don't pay attention to your feelings"... or something like "live beyond your feelings"-- yeah that can make real sense- but if you take that really to a not good level-- you could turn that into suppressing feelings-- like packing them deep deep down... NOT a good thing.

You remember the story about the train that said "I think I can... I think I can..." you read that story and feel pumped up... if you are like me.. you think of the story, and you are like "YEAH... come on... you can totally do it!!!!!" You feel good & positive!! Can you imagine if the train was like "I think I can... I think I can... well, actually it's too hard... I can't do this... I can't do this at all." OUCH-- even as I wrote that I felt saddened. It amazes me how little things can make your emotions sway one way or the other- and how FAST that happens too... I mean like seconds man!!

Life is full of disappointments and let downs-- but it's how you deal with them-- there should be some kind of a life balance.

Here's an example of something I'm dealing with... So, we all know about me getting sick a couple of months ago- and we all know that the medicine I was on induced type 2 diabetes... and we all know that I am totally working on controlling my blood sugar to (crossing fingers) reverse it.  *If you are just joining us-- I encourage you to go back and read some of my earlier blogs-- especially the testimony one* Well- let me tell you all that this "controlling blood sugar" thing and pricking my fingers twice a day is driving me NUTS-- some days I am okay with it and others-- well, lets just say are NOT good days... finger wont give me enough blood... fingers sore (whether you test on the side or not)... sugar too high... feeling SUPER sick and nauseated... the list goes on and on. Especially annoying when my hubby is home for 24 hrs and I haven't seen him all week- only to feel extremely sick. GRRRRRRR!!!!! All this leads me to say... when I speak "I can't do this... I can't seem to feel better... I can't have this or that..." it makes me feel punished... sad... upset... angry. When I realize exactly what I am speaking and how it makes me feel... I want to turn it around next time. Today, I caught myself saying "I can't have this" at the grocery store-- and then I was like "no no don't say that..." I may not be able to have this but I can have that.

A balance. I've noticed that there is a balance to everything-- life, health, finances... good/bad balance. Do you have balance in your life? I mean, is there a balance- like everyday is not going to be a happy day- bad things happen- but do you have a balance of happiness to make the scale close to even?



So, when I was feeling punished, sad, and discouraged... I was like thinking- God really doesn't want me feeling this way. He loves me and gave me breath- why should I feel this way? It doesn't add anything to my life- worry, stress, anger-- none of these are good things- He doesn't want me feeling this way- and I can make the choice to turn around and give those feelings to Him. It's not a fancy process- it's quite simple.

God, I'm feeling bogged down by my life and circumstances around me- help me not be weighed down- I feel like I have cement shoes on- take the cement shoes off- help me make good choices, help me get healthy, help me deal with the health issues I am battling-- let me see your glory through all of this and be Your light shining for others to see your light through me. In Jesus Name I ask and pray. Amen.

You make your prayer say what your heart feels- or pray what it says above- either way- ask Him for help. He will come to your rescue- Don't stay in the dark and twisty place-- come into the sunshine-- it's a lot better... I promise. 

So, the next time you are in a "I can't" spot... try to remember...

Take care of you :)

Recovery is a learning process

Have the flu? What do you do to get better? Drink liquids, lots of rest, take your medicine, stay in bed... why? Why do we do these things? So that we can "recover" and get better.



*chuckling* The question is... do you allow yourself time to recover?


Be honest...

Day 1 of being sick... "ugh, I feel like a truck hit me!!" and you go to the doctor & get meds and then you sleep and sleep and sleep some more- through days 2 and 3.

On day 4 you realize you are feeling better (but really are not 100% yet) and want to do EVERYTHING!! You think "oh, I can go grocery shopping now... I need to do the dishes... the laundry needs washed... ewww the bathroom needs to be torched and built back from scratch (lol)" ... you start to do these things... and realize 1/2 way through the FIRST task... BIG MISTAKE... HUGE... BIG... HUGE!!! Do you know why even starting was a mistake?

YOU ARE IN RECOVERY!!!!! 

Recovery is a learning process... learning what it means to take it easy, to take care of yourself...to (as hard as it is) BE STILL. Why? Because recovery is the key essential to getting well. You've heard people say "They made a full recovery!" Think about it... recovering is a key part that is played into your sickness.

Does your sickness necessarily need to be the flu, stomach virus, sinus infection, surgery, etc... NO! Your "sickness" can be anything you personally need to "recover" from. Examples:: Break-up/ divorce, a friendship relationship, family issues, drinking, smoking, any addiction...

You are trying to get well... there are steps to take... you are in recovery. You are on your way to "making a full recovery".

Im gonna use my illness as an example for you... I was diagnosed with Bells Palsy in June... although my muscles in my face are not 100% YET... we are working on it each and everyday... I AM IN RECOVERY. I also am battling Type 2 Diabetes (because of the medicine I was on, it induced diabetes) The doctors say that there is a chance it will go away... I am hopeful... right now I am on medicine that makes me feel like crap, but I am believing it is working along with my diet and exercise... I AM IN RECOVERY.

Now that was just 2 examples of recovery... what ever your personal recovery story is... know that God has it covered! He is by your side even when you can't see the light at the end of the LONG DARK tunnel- and believe me... sometimes it can seem as if there is noooooo end! But there is an end!!! God has it all planned out- I mean, it's life guys... what would life be without the messy bits?

Trust God and call out to Him happy or sad... He's there for you. Believe that He has your best interest in mind. Believe that he will bring you through whatever it is... because He ultimately will. I mean... His plans are to prosper you and give you a hope and a future!!!! (Jeremiah 29:11)

Like I said... recovery is a learning process- let God mold you and shape you through the recovery-- learn to draw close to Him-- learn to be patient-- learn to calm down and rest-- to be still-- (it's not easy... but TRY...) and when you make that full recovery... you will be stronger, and know that with God you overcame!! And when something comes along that you need to recover from again, you will know from your "last recovery" that it will be okay and that you will make it... it's going to be okay.

May this blog touch your heart and may you know that you will make a full recovery... just you wait and see!!!




Take care of you :)